Gaming isn't just a pastime, it's a culture. After all, board game lovers often have their own mores and their own social rituals. But do gamers have their own language? Of course they do! It's Gamerspeak.
Since Google Translate hasn't yet taken it on, we'll help you out by translating a few key phrases from Gamerspeak to Standard English. Consider this your own personal guide to the Gamerspeak language.
A Gamer Says: "I need to buy a new game."
Translation: "I don't want to play the 100 games I already own."
Need is a subjective word in this instance. They might genuinely mean they've played everything in their closet and truly need something new. But let's be honest...there are probably games in there that still have the shrink wrap on them. No matter what, a trip to the game store is likely in the future.
A Gamer Says: "It's easy to learn!"
Translation: "The rules of the game are so complex that you'd never agree to learn upfront."
We all know those gamers who try to trick us into playing a complicated or involved game, telling us it's really not that challenging to get started. Hey, it's not their fault the rulebook is so challenging. They'll probably hoping the game will be so much fun that once you get sucked in, you won't be able to quit no matter how baffled you remain.
A Gamer Says: "This game is so much fun."
Translation: This game will make you want to bang your head on the table.
Also, it might make you want to bite your nails and punch the wall at various times. But sure, you'll have some fun along the way, too.
A Gamer Says: "It'll just be a casual game night."
Translation: "Show up to play."
Casual can mean a lot of different things. They probably think causal means they won't try to make you learn anything with 100 rules and 45-minute scoring tabulating at the end. But proceed with caution. Even Pictionary can get cutthroat.
A Gamer Says: "Don't eat that."
Translation: "Don't eat the game pieces."
Watch out when playing games with small pieces. You might think something looks like a cookie, but it's actually a coin/token/pog/counter/checker. Also it's been in the game box since 2015, so it's definitely not going to go over well.
A Gamer Says: "I'm too busy to go out."
Translation: "I'm organizing my game closet."
Sometimes staying in is much better than going out, especially if you have a closet full of games. They might secretly hope that you love board games as much as they do. Perhaps they'll even lure you over...surely when you get there, you'll want to stay for an all-night marathon of gaming.
A Gamers Says: "This should only take an hour to play."
Translation: "It could easily go 2-3 hours."
Either there's no way this game will take an hour, or they're hoping they can hook you right away. You'll enjoy yourself so much that you'll demand a rematch. After that there's a good chance you'll need to get out the expansion pack so...get comfortable.
A Gamer Says: "I know a bar that has great ambience."
Translation: "I have a well-stocked game shelf."
They'll probably start by talking about a place you can go out, but you know you're going to end up at their place by the end of the night.
A Gamer Says: "The deluxe version was reasonably priced."
Translation: "It was a small fortune."
Hey, at least it was (probably) less than the Swarovski crystal-encrusted Scrabble set.
A Board Gamer Says: "We have time for a quick game of risk before the event."
Translation: "We're not going to make the event."
Hey, you didn't want to go anyway, right?
If you love board game humor and gamerspeak, check out this article about how to always get invited back to game night!
